A love rooted in faith and resilience

For 56-year-old Peter Koh and his wife, Gan Gok Chuan, the vow to love in sickness and in health is not just ceremonial – it is something they live out every single day. Theirs is a story of quiet strength, enduring love and unwavering commitment through life’s harshest storms.

Peter and Gok Chuan met in church, drawn to each other by mutual respect, shared beliefs and aligned values. Gok Chuan, a kidney transplant recipient, was no stranger to health challenges. Yet love blossomed quickly, and the couple tied the knot not long after. They built a life together, grounded in compassion, resilience and a strong sense of partnership.

Thirteen years into their marriage, tragedy struck in the middle of the night when Gok Chuan suddenly collapsed. Peter rushed her to the hospital, where doctors delivered urgent news – she would need to resume dialysis immediately. Their swift action was critical; doctors shared that had they arrived any later, the outcome could have been far more serious. It was a turning point that would redefine Peter’s role – not just as a husband, but as a full-time caregiver.

“Caregiving was never a burden – it was my way of saying ‘I love you’ every single day.”

Peter Koh, who found strength and joy in loving through adversity

Rising to the challenge of caregiving

While Gok Chuan recovered in hospital, Peter faced some of his loneliest days. Returning to an empty house night after night was unfamiliar and painful. The once-warm home had turned cold with absence. Yet, instead of surrendering to despair, Peter found strength in prayer, routine and hope.

When Gok Chuan was discharged, she was weak and wheelchair-bound. Determined to support her healing, Peter developed a daily routine of waking at 8am to wheel her outside to enjoy the early morning sun. These small, consistent acts of love made all the difference. In just two weeks, Gok Chuan was able to stand up and walk again.

At the same time, Peter’s responsibilities intensified. His elderly parents moved in with them – his mother was already undergoing dialysis, and his father had been diagnosed with cancer. Peter became the primary caregiver for all three. His life revolved around appointments, treatments, medication schedules and meal preparations.

Even the nights were demanding. He often woke multiple times to ensure his parents had not fallen or needed assistance. Exhaustion was real, but Peter remained resolute.

Finding strength in the struggle

Despite the heavy toll of caregiving, Peter remained deeply committed to his personal growth. He was pursuing his theological studies at Bible College and refused to put them on hold. He carried his laptop everywhere, often studying beside his wife’s hospital bed. Rare as they were, free moments were used to jog, paint or reflect.

While difficult, caregiving became a mirror that revealed Peter’s inner strength. He overcame his long-held fears of needles, which he had to use to inject his wife, and of blood, which sometimes sprayed from her dialysis fistula. Rather than turning away, he leaned into the discomfort, knowing his care made a real difference.

Peter now serves as a peer support leader in NKF’s Caregiver Support Group, where he draws from his own journey to offer encouragement, practical advice and heartfelt understanding to fellow caregivers walking similar paths.

A love that grows stronger

Looking back, Peter harbours no regret. He describes caregiving as “sweet”, even in the face of hardship. For him, it was a way of giving back to his wife and parents. When his parents eventually passed on, he felt a deep sorrow. Not just from their absence, but from the silence that followed – the absence of daily tasks that had once filled his life with purpose.

Now, Peter devotes himself fully to Gok Chuan while working full-time as a pastor. He continues to devote love to their marriage through heartfelt gestures: candlelit dinners, small surprises and home photoshoots that capture joy beyond illness.

The couple recently celebrated 27 years of marriage – a journey defined by faith, endurance and a love that continues to deepen, even in the face of life’s greatest trials.